It’s a Wonderful Life…

On Christmas Eve, Amanda and I cuddled up on the couch and watched “It’s a Wonderful Life.”  Believe it or not, it was the very first time I had watched the movie all the way through.

I wasn’t prepared for how much the movie was going to speak to my heart, but by the end, I was so touched by how I could relate to what George Bailey was feeling during all of the hard times — and in the end by how he realized how much everything had been working toward the good through it all.

Especially during the past couple of months, there has been such a dichotomy of circumstances in my life.  It has been difficult to keep hanging on to faith that everything is going to work out, and yet I can look back and see how through my friends and family, God is working things out and letting me know that while we live in an imperfect world and crap is going to happen, there is still reason to believe in the Divine.  Yes, there is a reason to believe that the glass is, indeed, half full.

Take, for instance, the situation with losing my job.  We got our notices the week before Christmas.

How in the world is a single mom supposed to make a good Christmas for an 8-year-old girl when she isn’t sure there is going to be enough money coming in for the mortgage to be paid next month?  (I am one of the millions of Americans who live paycheck to paycheck.)

Sure, it’s all well and good to say that this will be a good time to teach her about how material things aren’t everything.  Believe me, she already understands that a lot more than most kids who live in this area do.  When I talked to her about it, my precious girl said, “It’s ok, Mama, all I want from you is a huggie and a kissie and a Taylor Swift CD.”

I believe with all of my heart that because of her pure heart, she was blessed for it.

Upon learning about me losing my job at the holidays, the mother of one of Amanda’s friends told some of her co-workers about it.  They all took up a collection at work and bought some Christmas gifts to put under our tree for Amanda.

I was stunned and humbled by such a thoughtful and generous gesture on the part of one friend and several strangers who wanted to be sure my daughter was blessed during the holidays.  I can’t quite describe the mixture of emotions I feel — teetering between the tearful thankfulness and my pride wanting to decline the gesture.  However, when my friend thanked me for allowing them to do this for us, I realized that they were being blessed just as much through the act of giving as we were from the receiving of the gifts.

Another example is the beautiful portrait Lynn painted of Amanda and then gave to us.  Something to be treasured all the days of both of our lives…and through these trying times, I can look at that beautiful work of art and see how through it all God chose to reveal Himself through the blessings of friends.

I think about a dad who, not knowing if my child’s father had gotten a chance to take her Christmas shopping or not, took her along with his own daughter to the mall so that she could buy her mom a Christmas present.

I think about how that dad’s family has been so wonderful to my daughter.  How he picks her up from school once a week so she doesn’t have to spend every day at school until 6pm — so she gets a break from it once a week and gets to play with his daughter.  I think about how much that has meant to her — and how much I look forward to our weekly dinners when I pick her up after work at their house.

Something that’s often concerned me was that Amanda have good examples of solid families to be around, but then I think about how she does indeed have families like those of her friends’ to look to — about how much she admires  SuperMousey, her dad and their family, as well as her other girlfriends’ families — and then I realize…she is managing just fine.  Everything is working for the good.

I reflect on how incredibly fortunate I am to have the support and encouragement of so many of you who read this blog and who take the time to leave such thoughtful and encouraging comments from time to time.  I count you as friends…because you are all busy and you all have your own problems…so for you to reach out truly does touch my heart.  We all need each other during these trying times.

There is strength in numbers.

So finally, I must reiterate the words that the goofy angel Clarence wrote in the front of that book to George Bailey at the ending of “It’s a Wonderful Life”.  No matter how terrible life seems to be.  Even if everything around you seems to be falling apart — whether you’ve lost your job, your relationships are crumbling, your children are rebelling, your health is failing, your dog died, or your house is in disarray — and it seems as if you are a complete & utter failure, know that all is not lost…

“Remember no man is a failure who has friends.”